There is nothing more common nor more detrimental to marriage than an irritable, quarrelsome, critical spirit. It is so ordinary because it takes no brains, no talent, and no self-denial. It is so detrimental because it makes life miserable for everyone. The Bible warns us against this when it says, “Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter [irritable, quarrelsome, critical] against them” (Colossians 3:19).
The tragedy of bitterness is stated in the Bible. It says, “Better is a dinner of herbs where love is, than a stalled ox and hatred therewith” (Proverbs 15:17).
This is a lesson in contrast. It is saying that the worst possible meal in an atmosphere of love is better than the best possible meal in an atmosphere of hatred, quarreling, and criticism. Norma Zimmer once said, “Men, don’t criticize your wife. Her faults may be the only thing that kept her from getting a better husband.” It is still true that honey draws more flies than vinegar. Avoid bitterness like a plague. Ask God to help you to overcome a critical and faultfinding spirit. Ask him to help you to praise, encourage, and compliment others. It will be a great blessing to your marriage and bring great happiness to your own life.