It was a real verbal tug-of-war. She accused him of being sexually overbearing, and he countered that she was unresponsive. He then accused her of irresponsible spending. She accused him of being stingy. Back and forth they went.
When I had had enough, I said, “The real problem with you two is not sex or money. It is selfishness. You are self-centered to the core. You are both insensitive and inconsiderate of one another.”
That’s the cause of most marital squabbles. Things like sex and money are only the symptoms of the deadly sin of selfishness. With a little consideration and thoughtfulness, most other difficulties could be ironed out. Without them no marriage can survive.
After much more conversation the man said to me, “I will do anything I have to do to save my home.” I said to him, “I wish you’d said that to me about five years ago.” Sometimes we wait too long. Sometimes we are so insensitive, inconsiderate, and selfish that we destroy our marriage and our home. For some of you it’s not too late. Listen to and meet the needs of your mate. Then you will be in a much better position and you won’t be in some counselor’s office five years from now.