It’s ridiculous what’s happening to marriage today. For every person who says, “I do,” there’s another who says, “I’m through.” With marriage, every passing day finds the distance between the marriage altar and the divorce court growing shorter and shorter.
Why is this? It’s partly due to the fact that we have been sold a bill of goods. People who ought to know better have told us that love is the basis of marriage. Love, they define as a romantic feeling over which we have no control. So we have come to believe that when we no longer feel romantically toward our mate it is okay to get a divorce. People say things like this all the time: “I want a divorce because I don’t love him/her anymore.”
Commitment, not love, is the basis of marriage. When you married you promised, “Till death do us part.” You promised before God and witnesses. That promise—not some feeling—is the basis of marriage. On the basis of that promise you now must work, adjust, compromise, and bend so that you can live together in harmony. The basic problem with marriage then is not the lack of love, but the lack of integrity and maturity to live up to our promises.
If your marriage is in trouble don’t use the cop-out, “We don’t love each other anymore.” Stop being selfish and childish and proud. Talk over your problems with one another and a counselor. Ask God to help you and on the basis of your commitment build a good marriage. After all—you did promise.